Art, Errands, and the Mental Maze of the Everyday

Today being Sunday was kind of an off day for me. We ran some errands and came home and watched TV. I was really sleepy for a big part of the day. I didn't take a nap as I wanted to be up and spend time with my family. So I had to fight through it which by early evening it started to fade and I was much more alert.

I did the above piece in the featured image while I was trying to wake up. It was a fun piece and it didn't turn out like I originally imagined it, it actually came out much better.

The Creative Process

I was trying to come up with something and saw in an art group a drawing of a skeleton with tentacles coming out of it. It passed through my feed quickly so I didn't get the closest look at it. But wanted to see what I could do with the idea.

As it was forming, to me it began to look like a brain, filled with darkness and tangled and twisted thoughts. Maybe you see something different which is also fine. But I ended up really loving how it turned out and what it says for me.

Art and Symbolism

I kind of expressed this above. I feel art is very subjective and when I release a piece into the world, I don't like to project too much of my own meaning onto it. That's one thing I love about abstract art. Ten people can look at a drawing and come away with ten different meanings.

That said, I really love this piece a lot, it feels more personal than some of mine do. I know I crank out a lot of art, so its hard to feel connected to everything. At least on a deep level, but my manic brain moves fast so I don't often take as much time as I should to take in each piece and what it means to me. I guess that's where the tangled brain symbolism comes in. The skull to me represents the darkness that lurks in our minds, when I'm down and those scary dark thoughts creep in. Its not always loud but always there.

Mood and Energy Shifts

Any time I do art, it lifts my mood and energy. Maybe not energy in the sense of activity, but energy from the sense of moods and positivity. When I'm stressed, or tired or struggling to focus, I'll sit down and do a drawing. Most of the time it alters my brain and helps me see things from a more positive standpoint or at least keeps me from spiraling. I never felt this way back when I was writing scary things all the time. That was fun at times, but never really fulfilling. Art and blogging has been great for my moods and mental health and one of the most fulfilling things I've ever done.

Sensory Experiences

Running errands through the city this afternoon is always full of various sensory experiences. My wife usually drives when we go out because driving on the highway gives me bad anxiety. I can do it when needed, but she gets carsick in the passenger seat, and I get anxiety driving, so it works out.

I try not to look at my phone too much when we're out because I miss too much. The city is always full of cool decorations different times a year. Lots of interesting and unique characters walking around and no telling what you might see. One day out we saw a guy on horseback riding down the street. Another day we saw a guy walking his pet goat on a side street. One of the fun things about living in San Antonio.

The city is often full of amazing sights and sounds, at night really cool lights and colors. During the day many buildings and businesses have beautiful murals painted on them of some of the San Antonio Spurs players, Selena or even Ruth Bader Ginsberg. Some murals are just a collage of images and colors. I'm an artist, but I can't imagine doing something like that of that scale and in that kind of detail. Those artists are true magicians.

Contrast Between Solitude and Activity

Being as I work from home, and have social anxiety, its very easy to isolate. During COVID we went weeks without going anywhere at all. We could easily do that now, but my therapist has me on orders to get out of the house for an actual outing at least a few times a week. So we'll go to the mall to walk around, if its nice I'll walk around the block. A few times a week recently we started going to the library to work from there and check things out. Its nice there though some days people are louder than you'd expect for a library.

Being at home and isolates is fine a lot of times. I like being home, we have a big TV and everything I need here. But some days I feel like I need to get out and move around or just get a change of scenery. One thing we enjoy doing a few times a year is going out out to Taylor Swift dance parties. That's pretty much exactly what it sounds like. There is a DJ playing pretty much all Taylor Swift tracks while people go up on stage and dance, there and on the dance floor and people dress up in various Taylor themed outfits and have fun. Its a good way for us to get out and cut loose and socialize with our Swiftie pals.

Reflections on the Day

Now that the day is over, it was overall a good and productive day. The place we at lunch at wasn't great. It was a burrito place, but very Americanized and too corporate like. Other than that, I feel I gained a lot of insight on myself and the city once again. I do a lot of out put, so I try to take in things as well as much as possible. That may not always be by just reading, but also by consuming art, taking in the city or just experiencing being around people. Even though sometimes that drains my social battery, its still a form of input and ideas for me for art and blogging.

So I guess my takeaway is don't be afraid to get out there, to try things, to experience things. Honestly I'd rather have experiences and memories than a ton of things I don't know what to do with. All those things can be channeled into art or writing in some fashion. Possessions cannot be. If given the choice, I'll always choose an experience. Thank you again for stopping in. Feel free to subscribe so you don't miss any of my craziness. Until next time.